(January 23rd 2015)
Blog: Well well
So my Cartoon Hangover pitch was last Wednesday and, it was unsuccessful. I can’t really blame them in hindsight, I’m kind of amazed I didn’t pick up on some of the stuff they fed back before I pitched it. But, a promise is a promise so, in case you ever feel like pitching them something here’s the feedback I got.
There wasn’t a lot of variation in terms of how problems are solved; my characters were going through a temple killing monsters and, although dominant strategy might be true to video game logic it makes for pretty boring viewing.
I didn’t state at the start why they were going into the temple or what it was they had to do and instead just vaguely alluded to them having to do something. Again, quite embarrassing on my part because it’s a pretty basic standard in writing that the audience needs to know why a character is doing something, maybe not specifics but they at least need an emotional driving force.
As kind of an offshoot of that they also didn’t know why my characters are with each other, so to speak. This is partly because I didn’t explain anything at the start but it’s also partly because of the next problem.
Last but not least, the characters weren’t well written. They didn’t actually say that but they did say that my banter was too generic and, looking at them objectively, it’s because those characters were at best somewhat pleasant but bland as all hell. Also there’s a remarkable lack of character flaws and when they do come up they don’t actually have any detrimental effects. Again it’s slightly embarrassing that I have a degree in script writing and I just “kinda forgot” that characters are likable because they have flaws and are interesting because they cause complications.
On the plus side Eric liked my montage and action scenes, which is weird seeing as I’ve never really thought of myself as a particularly visual person.
In conclusion maybe I was trying to over compensate and inadvertently pushed character development to the background in favour of set pieces and enemies.
Get a Gum!
Made by Sean
... and subsequently butchered by Me.